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  • Tuesday, February 27, 2007

    Stupid Gets As Stupid Does

    Few hours ago, my tummy was calling out "feed me! feed me!". I had no choice but to submit to its cry. So I remembered there are left over fried rice in the fridge which I had yesterday.

    A friend indeed

    For that moment, I thought I was a graduate from James Cook School.

    "What can go wrong just to heat up a freaking plate of fried rice? Lets see 10 min will be just great."

    -After 10 min-

    Looks like cat shit droplets on cow dunk

    And there goes my supper... Hangus(burned)...

    mandarin orange

    My life saviour.

    Sunday, February 25, 2007

    Pride Comes Before A Fall - Ultimate "Kia Su-ness"

    Clarification: Melz is not like that in real life, only when in the mood and among close friends.

    -10pm, Chong's house, playing Black Jack-

    The stake was getting high as 11pm draws near, only 3 of us were playing Chong, Jin and Me. My balls grew to the size of a
    'nangka', from RM0.20 to RM 2 as the game lasted longer.

    Melz: "I confirm sure win you wan, your money there... Will ALL be mine!"

    Chong: "Oh.. Lets see, lets see..."

    Melz - 0
    Chong - 0

    "Melz Art of War" technique 458: Talk cock - To reduce targets moral/fighting will during competition.

    Melz: "You know ar, during Tracy's birthday I be dealer and I sapu all the $$, Yip he play till no $$ but I so gud I give him some $$ and let him try win back, mana wa tau I sapu again!! Hahahaha, too ong(lucky) weh, can't help it!! You gona share the same faith, so ready to lose?

    "Ceh! How sure are you? I got my lucky crystal here and I am in my house, quick la give card I wana do the splitting."

    "Sure no prob, I shall grant your wish, letting you lose under your very own hand that freaking splits the card!"

    -Around 10:30pm-

    Melz - 1
    Chong - 0

    Melz: "Told you I sure win wan don't believe some more, dealer always wins especially when the dealer is me, the force is strong within me."

    Chong: "Just you wait la don't talk so soon, you will never know what will happen."

    -Around 10:45pm-

    Melz - 1
    Chong - 1

    "Melz Art of War" technique 327: Act "as if I had already won" - To make your opponent feel irritated.

    Melz: "See, this is a sign before I make you can't sleep tonight and you will be scratching your arse in bed wondering and asking your self "how I lost to him ar?""

    Melz: "Tell you la Tracy's party that time I also lose till I nearly broke, birthday girl 3-4 times starting black jack, wah nia that time I thought sure habis(gone), but I over turn and pwned all!"

    "Chong don't you see? This is the end!! I will win!! Hahaha!!"

    Chong: "Hahaha! Very funny la, look man who is having the big bucks now?!?!"


    Melz - 1
    Chong - 2

    Melz: "Aiyoh! What is this, it can't be... Eh not fair la, play some more la, no balls ar? Why you sleep so early wan? If play till 12am I confirm you lose till you got to kick me out of the house."

    "I got work tomorrow la, and you no more money."

    Melz: *Sigh* "Eh, who say no money, your mom gave me ang pau just now so got extra, but never mind la since you need to work tomorrow, give you face only, next year sure I win wan."

    Saturday, February 24, 2007

    A Malaysian Translation Went Wrong

    I was walking around 'Toys R Us' and I came across something "hot".

    No I am not talking about Barney...

    At another corner, something even hotter caught my eyes.

    As some of us know, this year the government is making up some "Visit Malaysia 2007" thingy. I bet the tourist and the sales person will have a conversation that might sound like this.

    Tourist: "Excuse me, can you tell me what is the meaning of 'panas panas'?"

    Sales person: "It means 'hot hot'."

    Wednesday, February 21, 2007

    History House CNY Visit - Seremban

    Dragging me self off me bed early on me wonderful morning, preparing to do the 1 in a year thing - going back mum's home town(Seremban).

    A sky view I took on the way back to Subang

    Upon arrival, as usual the "san neen fai lok"(happy new year), "gong hei fat choi"(may prosperity come into your bank account - which will NEVER happen) will be the first sentence we hear among adults conversation.

    I did my thing too as custom in the Chinese tradition, and went into the house.

    Mini gate before front door

    Looking at Suk Gong(my grandpa's brother) reminds me 7 years ago he was as fit as a tiger, he looks as if he could break coconuts when he bash it on his head, but now he is only a shadow of his former glory... Struck with hearing problem and less talking to us as each year goes by...

    Me, Suk Gong

    7 Years ago as I remember me and my cousin bro - Ryan running around the house chasing chickens, Suk Gong will always be there laughing with/at us when we fail a catch. Now, there are no more chickens around, God knows which stomach they ended up in, so were the fun times, only carved as memories at the back of our mind.

    2 side views from the old British Colonel house

    Yes, this house was once owned by a British Colonel and family during Malaya times, it was later sold/given(can't remember) to my Suk Gong when the Colonel had to return to England.

    2 back views, right side is the back of the kitchen

    Take a wild guess when was this picture below taken, do leave your guesses in the comment, remember do not scroll down and look at the answer ok, if not no fun. =)

    Guess, and no peeping the answer below! =P




    Can't guess? I can assure you your answer is 100% wrong. Its taken on 2004 at a photo studio in England when Suk Gong visits his daughter(most right) and son-in-law + grandson, the lady standing beside my Suk Gong on the left is my Suk Poh - his wife.

    Freaking real rite?? I got fooled my self, I thought that dude was the British Colonel & family till I asked.

    Hence, there goes another year in Seremban. We went home around evening, along the way back I notice something odd about the highway.

    Left: Starting of highway
    Right: Middle of highway

    The road fellas took few tongs of paint and sell as mayonnaise??

    Monday, February 19, 2007

    This & That

    I was walking into Summit one day, on the way I saw this sign placed on the floor.

    "Don't place it beside the road"

    I wonder does it mean the motorbike or the board it self?


    Reunion dinner was on Saturday night, as usual every years dinner was a drag.

    After the dinner I saw this on the table.

    Kinda small for mandarin orange. Normally I eat the bigger ones.

    Saturday, February 17, 2007

    A Day Out In Bangsar & The Curve

    Note: If you are someone who hates Bangsar/KL life style, I advice you not to read, this entry is also a bit lengthy due to lots of pictures so please bare with me, thank you.

    1st of all I wan to wish all my Chinese friends a Happy Chinese New Year, and to all my non-Chinese friends, happy holidays.


    Yesterday I visited my friends in Bangsar Baru. Before the meet up, I decided to hang out in the newly build 'Bangsar Village 2' a.k.a BV2 which is connected by this "skywalk" with 'Bangsar Village 1' a.k.a BV1.

    A side view of BV2 from the other end

    BV2 and the "skywalk"

    BV1 connected to BV2 via "skywalk"

    It is just one floor high, what so "sky" about it??

    The "skywalk" filled with CNY atmosphere

    I find BV2 is quite a nice place, the only problem is most of the shops there are meant for girls.

    See what I mean... And where are those darn cinemas & bowling alleys???!!!

    I notice this strange phenomena in Bangsar Baru, there are 3 MPH, 3 Starbucks and 2 Coffee Bean(sorry I did not get hold of the pictures). They could build so many of this useless outlets but not cinemas and other lepak place..!

    Behold the MUST visit place if your coming to Bangsar Baru.

    The famous Devi's Corner that the Discovery Travel and Living Channel
    talked about when they showcase Malaysia

    Nirwana Maju - The place where they served the BEST banana leaf rice

    They even use plastic cups when you bungkus drinks, other mamaks got a lot to learn

    Look at the amount of people, some have to wait for their turn to be sited

    Soon I meet up with my friends - Isaac and Nazmi. Isaac drove us to The Curve to watch "Ghost Rider". I rate it a good movie and worth watching.

    We got lost on the way back from Curve, lots of turning and stuff, they don't call that place "The Curve" for nothing, it took us 1 hour to return to Bangsar.

    Later in the evening, Mahdi a.k.a Po/Potato and Juan join us. After our dinner at Devi's Corner, we head over to 'Fish & Co', because they serve super delicious fries.

    Yumm yumm..... The crisp, the taste of potato, the just nice amount of salt.....

    After the tiring day out, we decided to call it a day. Isaac drove us all to Subang to drop me off.

    -Very very very lame joke-
    (non-photoshoped image, only the words)

    After watching Ghost Rider Isaac found his new power, he became - "Ghost Driver".

    The Curve car park - Day time

    On Federal Highway - Night time

    "Help us!"

    Sadly the wiper gave us a kick in the arse. The heave rain and a pair of 17 year old unpredictable spoiled wiper can never mix. We pulled over and wait for the rain to stop.

    Mahdi and Isaac trying to fix it

    At the end of the day, all of us safely reached home. Hence this long entry comes to an end. Thank you for reading, I know some of you might have felt bored reading it. Better post next time k. =D

    I leave you with this - picture of the day.

    Hmm.... Mahdi oh Mahdi... Kenapa...

    For more Mahdi in action, catch "Po Suk Lan" the movie now on youtube!

    Thursday, February 15, 2007

    Boy's Toys - Misused

    -Short up date for today-

    1st of all, I am sorry for the late up date, I wanted to up date yesterday night but I had to be in bed early because of this.

    My undang test results that I took this morning

    Wakakaka...! Passed.


    Anyway, few days ago I went to Chong's place, his dad was cleaning the house as preparation for the up coming CNY.

    When his dad came across this in Chong's brothers room, he ask us to dump it on the way out.

    Wah nia! The hack his brother did in his fathers workshop la?

    Look at the size of that thing! If I am not mistaken its above my waist length with its tip touching the floor.

    Before continuing the story, I wan to clarify something, Chong's dad is a carpenter, his brother worked for his dad in the workshop during school holidays, so I guess his bro made this back then when he is too free.

    So I was wondering, what can his brother possibly use this thing for other then swinging it around acting macho??

    I could only think of these...

    Cut stuff??

    Hit stuff??

    Drama??(sorry will make the words bigger next time)

    Soon I sensed the dark side in this crafted art.

    A perverts ultimate dream tool because of its freaking length.

    Got better ideas?

    Monday, February 12, 2007

    "Trespassers Will Be Prosecuted" / "Penceroboh Akan Didakwa"

    I am very sorry, I do not have much picture to post in this entry due to some problem so words will be more this time, and I am unable to up load more photos for this entry.

    Back in high school days, we tend to run away from school then to come into school due to some pain in the arse teachers and the fear of getting our shiny butts scarred cause of our piled up school work.

    We would not even open our gold filled mouth to sing the school anthem and the 'Negaraku".(I am only guilty for the 1st wan)

    Nevertheless, me and my homie(Chong) decided to turn our evening fat burning jog into an "adventure" back at our good old school, just to snap some photo of it when there are no stupid fools running around that wan to try pose in our picture.

    -Chapter 1: The Journey Begins *in front of school gate*-

    Note: We don't wan to cost a big fuss in the name of picture taking, so we decided...

    Melz: "Aiyoh gate lock la, how la."

    Chong: "There is always the 'lubang'(hole) that people used it to skip school, we can used that way, just hope that we don't get caught..."

    Melz: *Ignoring the "Penceroboh Akan Didakwa" sign in front of the school gate* "Oh ya hor! How could I forgot about it, don't worry la we sure won't get caught wan, remember we did it last time, see we still in one pice."

    Chong: *Guard looks sleepy, his head on the table* "Alright lets hurry, I got to go home soon."

    -Chapter 2: Enter The Matrix *after squeezing through the 'lubang' we are inside-

    Note: Here are some pictures we took.

    With flash

    With no flash

    With no flash + me

    With flash + a crazy guy

    -Chapter 3: On The Way To 'No.5354, Jalan SMK USJ 8/Getting Screwed'

    *Chong and Melz venture into the inner part of school - where danger awaits them.*

    I so hate this room(no offence to my pengawas friends, no hard feelings k!) =)

    The sound of joy of those students who finish their PMR still haunts the wall

    "Ah, the good days where our mouth just won't open to sing those darn songs"

    *Imagine the 'Mission Impossible' Song Playing*

    *As Melz and Chong were taking those nice nice photos, from the pejabat(office) area Melz noticed a man in blue coming their way.*

    Melz: !!!! "Oh my gosh what the hack the guard ronda-ing(walk around) he not sleeping wan meh!!!"

    Chong: *Stunned there*

    Melz: "Babi run la!!!"

    Guard: !?!?!?

    *Melz and Chong ran as fast as they could till they reach the back part of school, near 'lubang'.*

    Chong: "Wait wait wait, the sky very nice la I wan to take a picture of it."

    Melz: "Yeah nice, take take."

    *Both idiots instead of making a run away, they stood there like fools taking picture of the beautiful sky(indeed it was), and this is what they ended up taking*

    The sky ended up out of the frame, but he ended up in it, thanks Chong

    A close up shot of the guard. He must be saying " Astalavista babeh!!" your going down!

    Guard: "Oi mari sini!"

    Melz & Chong: *Jia lat(oh no) loh this time.*

    Guard: "Apa you buat di sini?"

    -Chapter 4: So much for our happy ending-

    *Melz and Chong explained to the guard what were their intension, fortunately(YES!!) the guard knew we mean no harm, he told us to buat 'laporan'(make a report) on our "visit" in the log book, he also said
    "ini bukan masalah besar, tetapi you mesti ikut pintu depan lain kali"(this is not a big problem, but you have to come in from the front gate next time)*

    *On the way to the guard house, the guard took out his cell phone, he called "Pak Haji" - the old guard, due to his unknown command of language, I think their conversation was something like this.*

    Guard: "@#$%@#$% Penceroboh... @#$%@#$% Penceroboh... @#$%@#$% Penceroboh...

    Pak Haji: "@#$%
    @#$% Ikat!!(tie), @#$%@#$% Pancong!!(chop head), @#$%@#$% Sunat!!(.....)"

    *Haha, was just joking about the Pak Haji part, both of them are nice guards just doing their job, after all we were wrong, and we admit it*

    *Pak Haji soon came into scene, he gave a short lecture and left, the guard was relief and so were we, we asked the good man to take a photo of me and Chong, and here it is.*

    So much for "Syabas!! kerana anda hadir ke sekolah"(good job!! because you came to school)